Thursday, June 7, 2012

Learn how to cook! Pt. 1

In 8,000 B.C. when a man wanted to impress a woman, he did two things:

1) Killed a mammoth

2) [More or less] grilled it. 







Easy, right?

Yet with the decline in cavemen and the early extinction of mammoths, this tradition has all but died in their absence. But lets observe the pattern here:

A man loves a woman SO he wants to impress her SO he finds some quality meat AND he prepares it in a way that is both tasteful and delicious (cavemen did the best with what they had, you can too!)

I don't care what anyone tells you; grilling is an essential aspect of masculinity. If you want to be a man, learn first how to buy meat and second, how to prepare it. 

Think of all those summer days in your backyard growing up-- your dad grilling on the porch and your mom in the kitchen making a potato salad-- did you ever hear her complain that your dad was helping her prepare a meal? 

No.

So be like dad (or a very dapper caveman) and make the effort to cook for your lady. 

It may not be mammoth and it may not be your dad's prime rib, but here is a good starter recipe for a man looking to make an impression:

Marinated Chicken Breast

To begin, you will need:

1 tablespoon of soy sauce
2 tablespoons of vegetable oil
1 tablespoon of Worcestershire sauce
1 teaspoon of lemon juice
2 tablespoons of brown sugar
2 tablespoons of ketchup
4 chicken breasts
Fresh basil
Clover honey, to taste

Go to the local super market and purchase the above ingredients. When buying chicken, ensure that it is Grade A and check that the meat is well sealed and that the packaging is not leaky. Check the sell-by date and stay away from meat with odd smells or odors. Chicken can range in color from yellow to pink to white, but stay away from chicken that has turned a gray color.

Gray chicken = bad news.

Once all ingredients have been collected, place soy sauce, vegetable oil, Worcestershire sauce, lemon juice, brown sugar, and ketchup in a bowl. Stir until the mixture well blended and devoid of any lumps.

Divide the mixture between two separate plastic bags. Place two chicken breasts in each bag and ensure that the mixture covers the meat. 

Let the chicken marinate for at least 6 hours (it may be wise to prepare the marinade in the morning and let the meat marinate all day in preparation for your special night).

Once marinated, grill the chicken until it is no longer pink in the center and has reached a temperature of 170 degrees. 

Place on a plate and garnish with finely chopped fresh basil. Finish with a glaze of honey to taste. 

And there you have it, gents!

Easy, delicious, and impressive. Just like mammoth.

Kind of.

Cheers.

--Dapper Chris

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